There's this Dominican guy at my job who's missing four of his front teeth and when he laughs or smiles he uses his big Dominican upper lip to cover the gap then he suspiciously makes eye contact with everyone around to see if we've noticed the gaping hole in his mouth. Raul and I had a deep conversation over soft tacos and bean burritos at Taco Hell about gold-diggers.

You see, there are two types of gold diggers in this world. One is the Versace Chic and the other is the Hoochie Mama. The Versace Chic is an expert ho and if you play your cards right, she may even let you stick your penis into her unusually large, smelly asshole. The latter is a notorious golddigger who is known for sporting a huge black ass composed of black flab, cottage cheese chunks, and other animal lard deposits.

Let me explain myself a bit.

The Versace Chic often dolls herself up in the top of the line clothing, wears the best smelling perfume, and is the master of the Valley girl accent. That includes using the statement "Like....Whatever!" or "Like .....Wo!" at least 70 times a day. She is a master con and if you play your cards right, you'll be able to explore her unusually large, blackened butthole. Like this girl K I used to work with at a supermarket owned by a local gifilte fish-eating Jew. She was a master Versace Chic. Nice young lady and all, but I would always ponder why her jeans would ride so far up the crack of her asshole and why there were always puss-filled pimple sore around her lips and mouth.

The Hoochie Mama wears clothing sold off the street that is suppose to resemble the real name brand. Instead of "Gap" jeans, the label will read "Gak jeans" Or instead of "Tommy Hilfiger" it will read "Tommy's Lil' Nigger." I heard originally that the rich white fuck didn't want his line of clothing worn by dangerous minorities, but when I saw a pair of his brand name jeans stretched across the ass of this huge fucking ghetto bitch, I disregarded the rumor.

There's this Laotian bitch I know named Menosh and she tries to front as a Versace chic and a Hoochie Mama by wearing the clothing, walking the walk, and talking the talk. However, she can't quite speak the language, so she ends up sounding like a stupid Mongolian monkey. A few years ago this Laotian bitch had her gallbladder removed, so from time to time she can't help but take a fat, Laotian poop on herself. That usually ends up ruining the clothing. I'm certainly glad I still have my gallbladder; I would hate to live life know that at any given moment of the day, I could poop on my own person.

And there's this black girl I know from Olney named Laquita who is a true example of a Hoochie Mama. She's always looking to get money from your pocket by trying to appear sexy so all the "thug niggas" will chase after her. I won't. I often see Laquita walking the streets-her fat black ass stuffed into a pair of Tommy's Lil' Nigger cut-off shorts. And her fat gut often hangs out like a fucking Christmas wino's.

The big black fuck is a golddigger who will suck the cum from your dick, steal your wallet, and then spend the money on fake nails and accesories, fake clothing, and then quickly run to Burger King to add animal lard and flabby deposits to her huge black ass.

I can't stand it when I see a Hoochie Mama at a fast food joint whose fat carcass looks as if will explode out of the XXX large clothing she's wearing and she has absolutely no idea that it's the bacon doubles that are putting on the weight. When I see a fat black bitch eating a family sized order of burgers by herself, I will quickly make eye contact with her, then look down at the food and then suspiciously look away because I know that she knows that in my head I'm asking, "Jesus bitch, are you going to eat all of those yourself?"

And there's this Dominican guy at my job who's missing four of his front teeth and when he laughs or smiles he uses his big Dominican upper lip to cover the gap, then suspiciously makes eye contact with me to see if I've noticed the hole in his mouth.

Anyway, I'm really tired of running into fat, black bitches with fat black behinds who think they're all that, as well as Versace bitches with an unusual amount of pus-filled cream puffed pimples around their mouths and wide-cracked assholes.

If I had my way, the Versace's would be made to drink my cum from a plastic water bottle while I snorted an eight ball of coke and played Vintage Ms. Pac-Man on my Sony Playstation and the fat black asses would be sent to a processing farm in Wisconsin were they would cut up the flabby black beef that makes up the flabby booty, stuff into a can labeled "Big Black Hoochie Mama Ass," and sell it at the nigger supermarkets like Murray's and Save-A-Lot for approximately fifty cents.

P.S.: All racial slurs are the comments of the Frozen Food Master and not the webmaster. So go stick a big green banana in your butthole!